Princess Lilue

Found this mail forwarded to my mailbox..

I dunt know whether i am supposed to write it here or not, but i guess..just take this as a piece of my not-so-good thought.

Couple of weeks ago, a friend of mine come over to my place, and as what she said to me, she just wanna have some peace and rest.Well, even we're very good friend, she's not the type who's always come over to my place for weekend, cos she was always busy with her 'commitment'.But i guess that day she need somebody to talk to..so, i prepared my ears to lend it to her.

At first she seems like having nothing unusual, but i can say that she was good in acting.She laugh, telling me gossip, so and so...but her eyes told me that something was wrong somewhere.My mind keep on thinking 'bout her weird act, about her so-called commitment, and many others thing that could relate to her.I thought she wasn't yet ready to share, but it wasn't for long.Finally she burst into something that made me drown into a deep thought.

Friend : I envy u..u know
Me : (half laughing) Envy? ooo c'mon, u know i got nothing to envy.At the age of 30, i'm still single..still makan gaji n gotta work like hell for life..
Friend : well..at least u still can hope for a good guy to be your ehem..ehem..(she laugh a bit..a fake laugh i can say`)
Me : Merepek la..
Friend : U know wut i usually did at saturday nite like this?
Me : Emm..you aa,dating la kan..wut else..
Friend : hehe ...(again..fake laugh)
Me : well..how bout dis weekends? Miss me so much ke sampai u wanna stay here..?(jokingly..)
Friend : I kecik hati ngan Fazziq (her bf)
Me : kecik hati?well..u ni,cepat sgt melatah la.dis time ape dier buat?he forget to puji u cam dlu gak ke?
Friend : No la..
Me : anything to share..?
Friend : I didnt called me 2 days..and i get worried.maybe he got into something ke.. so,i finally decided to call him.at first he didnt answered, i tried for second time..again..not answered..and it's not engaged..
Me : Then..
Friend : It 8.30pm, so i fikir baik la..maybe he's at surau
ke, though i know dats kinda illogical for him.So just for my own
satisfaction, i tried for the 3rd time..
Me : He picked it up?
Friend : yup..and then simply end call (u know the tune rite..?!)
ME : then, wut did u do?
Friend : I got mad la..wut on earth dat make him end call macam tu je.Let
say he's busy pon..just tell me,no need to put me like dat kan..so,i called
him again and again..
Me : ...(listening to her)
Friend : then finally he picked the line.u know what he said when i asked nape dier tak angkat my phone?
Me : wut?
Friend : "takde ape nak cakap, tu sebab i tak angkat.."
Me : So, u kecik hati cos dier tak angkat phone you?
Friend : no..i know maybe dier penat
Me : so..ape yang u kecik hati nyer?
Friend : (sigh) u know kami akan kahwin this year or next year, and spend life together.But, how we gonna marry and living together, when skarang ni pon kami dah takde ape nak dicakapkan?isn't that marriage is for sharing your life.. then, how we gonna share when we got nothing else to be shared? i'm upset..
Me : emm..maybe he doesn't mean that way..
Friend : If he doesn't mean that way pon..it makes me think you know.How am i gonna spend my life with this man, when skarang ni pon.."takde ape nak dicakapkan.."

I am startled, and somehow agree with what my friend had said.I know her boyfriend very well, he's nice, and caring enough.But what make him to say that thing.Got nothing else to say..seems like as if they had it enough..no more to share.Well..i am not so experienced in this love matters..but,it makes me wondering..isn't love is for sharing and caring? Giving and receiving? And when it comes to the point that u got nothing to share..is it the end of your lovelife?

sigh..

I am one of those who finds it difficult to talk to people but that doesnt mean i don't talk at all. To those closest to me, i can sometimes talk non-stop.. hehe..

which is why being able to talk to my partner would definitely be a priority to me.. like my parents.. even after more than 30yrs of marriage, they are still each other's best friends & can chat non stop abt everything & nothing at all..

heck, one time, they were doing some gardening (or rather "menebas lalang") at my grandfather's house, they'd be chatting for hours & barely doing any work.. a passing neighbour even commented why on earth would my parents rather stand around in the middle of the "semak", being harressed by mosquitoes than be seated comfortably in the living room to chat.. hehe.. yup, it's that 'bad'.. ;)

It may be a minor thing, but ability to "talk" to your partner, to me is quite important.. besides, if you're gonna live with this person for life, not being to talk will mean a verryy boring life together, init? hehe.. and i'm not even gonna say anything abt love, connection between the two & yadda..yadda..yadda.. u figure it out..