Princess Lilue

Feb 21, 2012

Am i?

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I know i'm a kpop fanatic & i love almost everything korean. I cant specifically explain why but i do.
Is it wrong?
Am i hurting anyone?
Do i bash your interest?
No, right? So let me be la..

How do you expect to be in my life if you cant handle/make allowances for my obsession?

Also, i have absolutely nothing against you & i know you are a good guy, but dont shoot me for saying that our conversations are too.. Hmm.. What word should i use?.. "cold" ? "no chemistry"? Is chemistry required to have a good relationship? I wouldnt know. :p

and why is it that i have to be the one to make the effort? You're the guy right? Just coz you are shy or clueless, doesnt excuse you from at least meeting me halfway. So sue me for preferring Leaders like Hyun Joong & Jiyong, whose character i truly admire, not just their looks.

So how now brown cow?

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Feb 14, 2012

Valentines..

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Happy valentines? I dont celebrate it but no harm for me to ogle my favourite guy, right? especially when he looks like this.. *swoon*

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Feb 7, 2012

#20BiasILove

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Hmmm.. i wonder if i can reach 20.. apart from the top 4, the rest are not in any specific orders..

1. Hyun Joong
2. G Dragon
3. TOP
4. Jae Joong
5. Hongki
6. Yonghwa
7. Jonghun
8. Jonghyun
9. Yoseob
10. Nickhun
11. Jang Geun Seuk
12. Yoo Ah In
13. Yoochun
14. Junsu
15. Rain
16. Young Saeng
17. Jung Min
18. Hyung Joon
19. Kyu Jong
20. Jinwoon

there's also a few bands that i listen to, but they're not exactly my biases like mblaq, clover, aziatic, mib, shinee, se7en, tablo, etc..

Swooning..

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How can i not swoon, looking at a guy who looks like this? ^_^

that smile..

that shirt...

that look...

like i said: swooning..

hehehe...

Feb 4, 2012

aha moment

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aha...

i just realised something....

i can spend hours "mengodek"/ "fiddlying" with my budget/forecast/analysis file...
but i get stressed when i have to do:
- recon work
- transactionional steps.
- trouble shotting copa/system and/or tracing some movement in sap. (somehow i'm still okay with excel)

hmmm.. what does that mean.. hehehe...

Weakness

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Is it possible to be bored working with people?
to not want to work with people?
Isnt there a job that do not require you to deal much with people? stand alone projects maybe?
i dont mind.

Sigh..
People skills, delegations and follow ups are not my strength.
And at the moment, i am not really looking into improving my weaknesses, even though i know i should.

and i also need to work on NOT being so nice.
Gotta be more assertive & "garang".
errr.. how? that is hard...

and there's so much expectations on being a manager.
on leadership.
on proposal for improvements.
on having your input in just about every single projects.
on keeping others on their toes.

sigh. i know its what i need to do it but...

p/s: another thing. i know i need to pick up/understand transactional process/logic, but i really, really dont like it. i dont mind analysing work. but i admit i'm not very good at the nitty, gritty details. i'm not patient enough. :(

Jan 31, 2012

Its difficult

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Its so difficult sometimes..
When you're at point a & you know you need to get to point b & you can see what point b "looks like".. But you have absolutely no idea how to get from point a to b.

Or maybe its just that i'm not patient enough. :(

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Jan 30, 2012

AJL26

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Just my 2 cents worth on the just-finished AJL26:

- totally did not get the "wanita seluruh dunia" & "gadis semasa". It was a bit mumbly & cant quite catch their lyrics for most part.
- somehow "kekanda adinda" didnt have the same kick as it usually does. Sound problems maybe? Same goes to lagu "kalau berpacaran", suhaimi & altimet did good, ana was a lil off.
- faizal tahir didnt rock it like usual either. And the gimic was getting a lil old.
- 3 suara, although was good, i also think they didnt push it to become great. Well, at least to my tone deaf ears, i thought they could have done better. But yeah, vocally they were outstanding. Still, jac couldnt replace anuar zain. Nope.
- aizat & of coz hafiz was amazing. No doubt about it.
- alyah too.
- najwa latif was so cool & delivered her song without a hitch. Good for her :)
- less gimic, more simple performance based on vocals. Not even gaggles of dancers to fill up the stage. I so like this concept!

Overall, the lot tonite consist of a lot of self composers (aizat, yuna, najwalatiff, pistol, monoloque, ana/suhaimi/altimet) and the girls all guitar-player (yuna, najwa, ana raffali). Seems like a pretty interesting future.

But i do think its a shame that they got rid of the irama malaysia sections. Yeah, not that many listen to them, & chances to win are almost none. But should not kick them aside either. You'd lose a big chuck of local culture that way..

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Jan 28, 2012

10 Rules for brilliant women

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By Tara Sophia Mohr

1. Make a pact. No one else is going to build the life you want for you. No one else will even be able to completely understand it. The most amazing souls will show up to cheer you on along the way, but this is your game. Make a pact to be in it with yourself for the long haul, as your own supportive friend at every step along the way.

2. Imagine it. What does a knock-the-ball-out-of-the-park life look like for you? What is the career that seems so incredible you think it’s almost criminal to have it? What is the dream you don’t allow yourself to even consider because it seems too unrealistic, frivolous, or insane? Start envisioning it. That’s the beginning of having it.

3. Gasp. Start doing things that make you gasp and get the adrenalin flowing. Ask yourself, “What’s the gasp-level action here?” Your fears and a tough inner critic will chatter in your head. That’s normal, and just fine. When you hear that repetitive, irrational, mean inner critic, name it for what it is, and remember, it’s just a fearful liar, trying to protect you from any real or seeming risks. Go for the gasps and learn how false your inner critic’s narrative really is, and how conquerable your fears.

4. Get a thick skin. If you take risks, sometimes you’ll get a standing ovation, and sometimes, people will throw tomatoes. Can you think of any leader or innovator whom you admire who doesn’t have enthusiastic fans and harsh critics? Get used to wins and losses, praise and pans, getting a call back and being ignored. Work on letting go of needing to be liked and needing to be universally known as “a nice person.”

5. Be an arrogant idiot. Of course I know you won’t, because you never could. But please, just be a little more of an arrogant idiot. You know those guys around the office who share their opinions without thinking, who rally everyone around their big, (often unformed) ideas? Be more like them. Even if just a bit. You can afford to move a few inches in that direction.

6. Question the voice that says “I’m not ready yet.” I know, I know. Because you are so brilliant and have such high standards, you see every way that you could be more qualified. You notice every part of your idea that is not perfected yet. While you are waiting to be ready, gathering more experience, sitting on your ideas, our friends referenced in rule five are being anointed industry visionaries, getting raises, and seeing their ideas come to life in the world. They are no more ready than you, and perhaps less. Jump in the sandbox now, and start playing full out. Find out just how ready you are.

7. Don’t wait for your Oscar. Don’t wait to be praised, anointed, or validated. Don’t wait for someone to give you permission to lead. Don’t wait for someone to invite you to share your voice. No one is going to discover you. (Well, actually, they will, but paradoxically, only after you’ve started boldly and consistently stepping into leadership, sharing your voice, and doing things that scare the hell out of you.)

8. Filter advice. Most brilliant women are humble and open to guidance. We want to gather feedback and advice. Fine, but recognize that some people won’t understand what you are up to (often because you are saying something new and ahead of your time). Some people will find you to be not their cup of tea. Some will feel threatened. Some people will want to do with your idea only what is interesting or helpful to them. So interpret feedback carefully. Test advice and evaluate the results, rather than following it wholesale.

9. Recover and restore. If you start doing the things that make you gasp, doing what you don’t quite feel ready to do, and being more of an arrogant idiot, you are going to be stretching out of our comfort zone–a lot. Regularly do things that feel safe, cozy, and restorative. Vent to friends when you need to. Acknowledge the steps you’ve taken. Watch your tank to see how much risk-taking juice you have available to you. When it’s running low, stop, recover and restore.

10. Let other women know they are brilliant. Let them know what kind of brilliance you see, and why it’s so special. Call them into greater leadership and action. Let them know that they are ready. Watch out for that subtle, probably unconscious thought, “because I had to struggle and suffer on my way up…they should have to too.” Watch out for thinking this will “take” too much time – when the truth is it always has huge, often unexpected returns.

How do you know?

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How do you know..

if you have chemistry with that person?

if that person is the one?

is it something you built up? this chemistry thing?

i find it very difficult to make friends. let alone to find the one. its a very rare thing for me to find a friend like Elly, who eerily happens to have a tons of things in common with me. ^_^ from our choices of men, music, kpop, kdrama to family, life in general & etc. obviously kpop, or specifically hyun joong was the reason we started connecting to each other. heck, we "talk" through whatsapp, twitter, fb, gmail/yahoo & office mail on daily basis now. and now that my office is right in front of hers, means we also get to have lots of last minute lunch dates. but she'll be moving soon, although not too far, but not as convenient as it is now.

so this new guy i met.
i've yet to see him in person (he has been pointed out to me before & i guess vice versa).
i've also yet to hear his voice over the phone.
i have been "talking" to him via sms (every 2 days. very specific one this guy).
so i am not making any specific decisions.
and i am reserving my full judgement when i actually get to see how we interact with each other in person.
i have no doubt he's a nice guy, i can tell from his messages (plus the things that i've been told upfront).
i have no issue with his background/job/qualification/whatever else you'd look in a partner that is.
and i know he's kinda shy.
and his messages are not rigid/serious. in fact he's quite the witty-joker type.

we "talk" but at the same time i feel like its not..erm.. it doesnt flow very well.
i dont know if its because he's not the greatest conversationalist.
i dont know if its because he's just very reserved. & careful about what he says.
i do know that if i'm going to be with a guy for the rest of my life, i need to be able to talk to him.
which for me who dont converse well myself, is a difficult feat to accomplish.

so now how? guess i'll have to wait and see how this plays out.

Jan 27, 2012

With the new toy in hand...

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Since i've gotten my new toy... there are a few adjustments that i think i need to do.

Firstly, i seriously need to wifi-ed my house. yess.. i am still using streamyx, connected by wire *shock* to the modem. ha ha. since this is the cny week, most digital outlets are still closed, so i'll have to wait. it's just getting that router thingy right? i'm have to decipher it somehow on how to set it up.. :p any nerd-alert around? hehhe

secondly.. with such a huge gadget, i think i need re-look at my "mode of transportation" aka my handbag. at the moment, i have err loads of craps in it really..and an ipad barely fit in there anyway (if i plan to zip it up i mean). and the whole point of having one is it's portability isnt it? i might not be carrying it every single day (but then why not? reality check: as if i have the time) but i want to at least be able to carry it around when i want to. but i also dont want to look like i'm carrying a luggage bag with me either.

am surveying for a larger handbag. these are some of the designs that i like.. mind you, designs aka shape, not brands .. coz i doubt i can afford an original ones. but wouldnt it be really amazing if i can get an original wont it? haha.. i prefer the squishy type, preferably leather rather than the hard-shaped & shiny type. err i'm too "ganas" & i'll probably be knocking things over with my bags, so i dont want to have scratches & lines & whatnots on my bag. anyway, these below are a dream. where can i get me one of these babies?

Coach's Kristin hobo bag

Hermes Birkin tote

Cole Haan The book bag

Prada

Jan 20, 2012

Merajuk..

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I feel like a 2-year old for feeling this way but i cant help it.

I may not be on my death bed, but when i say i'm sick, i truly am sick. And i'm not just fishing for sympathy, but you could have at least shown some, maybe a lil bit concern. Even statuesque/no-expression hyun joong can buy his buin medicines behind her back, you cant even be bothered to ask me how am i doing?

People say its the little things that count. I dont care about your money, your big cars & whatnots.. And i can only read so much from the crumbs of lines that you gave me. So forgive me if i make my own conclusion. I've been on my own for far too long so no worries about me not being able to take care of myself.. but if you plan to be in my life, you better make it a good one, coz otherwise, please.... Just leave me alone!!

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Jan 19, 2012

Testing...

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Testing out my new toy.. The downpart is I'm still down with fever & flu & coughing... But sick or not, my new toy is too exciting to stay away from... Heheh

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Jan 10, 2012

Hmm..

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Do i know what i'm doing? Hell, no! :p

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Jan 8, 2012

This is what we listen to these days?

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Maybe its just me... but as much as i really like these songs.. i cant help but feel that there's something really wrong with it.. :p

Adele's Someone like you - okay, i get it. your ex/crush already got married & you wished him well. cant you just leave it at that? Why does it have to be "I'd hoped you'd see my face & be reminded that for me its isnt over" ? for me, i'd tell those guys - see my face & know that i'm doing fine without you. i wish you well but i wont find someone like you, i'd find someone better than you...

Bruno Mars' Marry You - Really love this song.. but really, is marriage "something dumb to do" ? you "think" you want to marry me? and if we wake up & want to break up - its "cool"? i so wouldnt marry you if that's how you ask me.... :p

Beyonce's Best thing i never had - i love this song. and i agree with it. Just that i dont understand why you'd be talking about your ex & how happy you are that you're over him instead of talking about how happy that you're marrying your husband (mainly referring to the mv)? hmm...

Katy Perry's The one that got away - why worry about something that never lasted? for me, he wouldnt be the one that got away.. instead it's me that's the one that got away.. ahaks..

Christina Perri's Jar of heart - there's something about this song that just hooked me in. Been there before, sort of. And i so agree, who do you think you are to come back? But Christina, why did you learned "to live half alive" in the first place? he may have left you scars, but you dont have to live half alive just coz of him you know. you're strong enough. nuff said.

What do you think?

Jan 3, 2012

Start of a new year..

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sigh.. #IfYouWereMine....

Dec 30, 2011

Post-Birthday thoughts..

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It wasnt too bad today. Had the department lunch at Bangkok House, food's not bad, although quite on the expensive side. I even got myself a very pretty, home-made no-longer-secret santa present from one of the temp staff in my department. Had a whole lot of wishes through FB, although my bro & cousins & besties chose to wish me through sms instead. My cousin Izni decided to treat me with an early dinner (or more like pre-dinner since both of us are still full from lunch), plus a piece of birthday cake (kinda like tiramisu, but not exactly) with candle, before heading back to her mother's. Her sister, Kak Anis was still at home (My aunt baby-sits the grandson so Kak Anis will pick him up after work before heading back to her own house), so both of us Dec29 babies got to celebrate together-gether for a change. ^_^

December 29 =The Day of High Status

Capricorn's born December 29 are often destined to play a leading role in the life around them.

Capricorn's born December 29 has a low key sense of humor which is not always noticed or appreciated.

Highly intelligent #Capricorn's born December 29 are able to work both sides of the brain well.”

Dec 29, 2011

Saengil Chukahamnida...

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Happy Birthday to me..

So.. another year has passed.

Apart from the new job, everything else is still pretty much the same. oh, and i may have gained a few more unwanted pounds.. sob sob..

Plans for the day? none so far, apart from loads of work. (god, i sound so pathetic..keke).. i do have the department lunch & secret santa gift to look forward to. Just hope that for once i get some decent presents.. i always get the worst presents ever.. sob sob.. what i wouldnt give to receive a huge bouquet of flowers, like that show on tv just now. even if it was from her brother, not her husband. A girl can only dream, cant she? sigh..

If u think you're not making progress, look at where u were a year ago & you'll see how far you've come! :) #TheSW

Dec 27, 2011

Happy

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Pretending to be happy doesn't make you happy. But I hope you are as happy as you are pretending to be. #TLS

Dec 6, 2011

How to Fulfill Your Dream

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If you don't have a dream, start thinking about what the dream for your life is. Start believing that just having a dream begins the process of fulfilling it. You can do it if you're willing to let every step you take move you in that direction. Remember, you deserve the best life has to offer.

Read more: http://www.oprah.com/oprahs-lifeclass/How-to-Fulfill-Your-Dream-Video#ixzz1flhsTSZW

I really should start thinking of a dream for myself, right? after all, my birthday is right around the corner & its time to rethink what now..

;;

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